forever in love with you.

if this is how it feels,
the world spinning
my eyes closed
arms outstretched

if this is how it feels,
your soft touch
warm lips
quiet whisper

if this is how it feels
my heart racing
temperature rising
leaning into you

if this is how it feels
to fall in love
i want to fall forever
forever in love with you.

it isn't only clouds that cry

Sat by the pier and I waited
Waited for what I'm still unsure
For you to come?
I don't know why I would
Wait for you, I mean.
Why wait for someone,
when you know they'll let you down?
Because you do, you know.
You let me down often.

& by the time we said goodbye, my heart was already broken

from the time i wake
until the time i sleep
you're on my mind
you're pushing me.
to do what you want
to be who you are
without a care
without a thought
of the girl i am
or i'm trying to be

remember me?

i must say, i'm feeling bitter.
it's been so long,
and you still don't know me?
would you look at me for once?
i'm right here.
i made your coffee this morning,
i'm sure i'll make your dinner tonight.
i've been here all day, waiting for you.
i've been here all week.
all month.
all year.

just one look is all i ask
maybe then you might remember
who i am, and how to spell my name.

the cold of your heart burns my skin

another day passes that i don't hear from you
i'm beginning to wonder if you weren't just a dream
and if you were just a dream,
why did i have to wake up?
i want to sleep longer, i need to feel you again

you're everything i once was

i crawled into bed tonight
still wearing your shirt
i pulled it close to myself
hoping to catch your scent

you've been gone for too long
i'm starting to forget
the way your mouth looked
with each simple smile.

your voice no longer fills
the quiet in my mind
i can't feel your hand
any longer on mine

i guess it's safe to say
i miss everything about you
and i'm starting to forget
everything i miss.

the simple tastes of love

i once believed love could be unconditional
that once it happened, it couldn't go away.
unfortunately, i think it has.
and i think both of our hearts are shattered.
how did we let it get to this point?
why didn't we draw the line?
i wish you could have accepted
the little things in me.
you know, the way i bite my lip
whenever i became nervous
or how i'd always argue the little things
like what show we watched on tv
just because i liked to hear you talk
if i could, i'd go back to that place
that day that we met.
i'd tell you the truth,
that you can't force me to be
someone i'm not.
that despite how hard we would try
this romance could never work.
because you're too damn stubborn
to be content with someone
who loves you in the most simple of ways.

a life of broken glass

A fallen leaf, a frozen ground, and the icy wind are all that’s left as I stand in the rain
You’ve left me here again, you’ve left me here alone
But it isn’t the loneliness that worries me, no, not that. That’s a feeling I know.
A feeling I call my own.
What worries me is what’s wrong with me, and what’s wrong with me is worry
A vicious circle with a deadly end.
I’m never good enough, never strong enough, never proud enough
Not for you.
Not for them.
Not even for myself.
Our home is broken, you’ve made this quite clear
The dirty dishes inside on the counter are a mirror image of the life we live.
Or, rather, the life we once lived.
Nothing clean, not your heart not mine.
I don’t want to see them, not today, not ever.
I think I’ll stay here
And let the tears of the sky fall over me
The clouds are crying,
They’re crying for you
Whether the tears are happy or not, I’ll never know
They’re crying for me
They’ll wash me clean.

the way your hand fit mine.

It’s been a year since I’ve seen you but I’m proud to announce,
I’ve started to move on, I even stopped thinking of you when I heard your favorite song
Though I think you were always there, in the back of my mind
(because I always skip it anyway)
I didn’t think it was possible, I didn’t want it to be either
I didn’t want you gone, but I don’t think I had the choice.
That day I left you, you have to know, it hurt me too
(I just couldn’t let you see)
That day I saw you again, sitting on the park bench alone,
So much came back to me, so much I didn’t want to remember
Like the way your eyes would shine when you’d smile
(and the way your hand fit mine)
It’s hard to think that I was always wrong, and never right
I just thought for once maybe I could be, maybe I’d be alright
I started thinking highly of myself, & I thought I was strong
(until I heard your voice again)

all that binds me to you

it's the dead of night and i'm still awake
the dream of tomorrow quickly becoming my nightmare for today
my mind won't stop, it's out of control,
searching for something and holding on tight
to the idea of what could have been
what should have been.

as if these walls weren't stained enough

Our palms are sweating and I feel you sigh
As you push the hair from my eyes
With a soft touch I rarely know
And in the afterglow of what has just happened
I begin to forget what made me want to let go
Was it the way you could disappear,
As if you wanted to leave?
Or the way you look at her,
As if she’s someone you want me to be
Perhaps the way you’d yell those words,
As if your fist doesn’t hurt me enough.
Yet here in this moment alone with you,
None of this comes to mind
And I can act as if we’re happy again
So if you would, please do me a favor
Draw a smile on my heart,
With paint so thick it’ll never wash clean
So that even when it hurts,
The pain they’ll never see